The return to Gorodische (for the third trip in 2018) was initially planned many months earlier. There was a partly selfish reason for this visit, a major event to celebrate with our “heart adopted” daughter Tanya. But returning at this time of the years took some more consideration than the previous trips – we would be leaving our three boys at home at a time of year that is generally considered as family time – but it now feels like we are balancing two families. It would be Joanne and I, travelling over late Christmas/New Year to spend one more valuable week with our family in Belarus. An initial mention of the trip to the wider group of volunteers at a truck loading day in Ennistymon started a buzz of excitement and potential numbers went from two to four to more, I didn’t expect in the early planning days that we would be a band of 9, three over Christmas and six others joining for the New Year celebrations. This would surely be a trip to remember – not that each isn’t – but this was at the most magical time of the year. Rosie, Ruth, and Kate (who had been in Gorodishche from before Christmas) were about to be joined by Claire, Gary, Laura, Rosie Eile, Joanne, and I – are we completely mad or what? (answers on a postcard please).

Parties are such a big part of our visits; they’re not celebrated just because the Irish are in town. But I expect that all of the parties that have Irish participation take on a whole new meaning and level of hype and excitement, on this trip there are five separate birthdays, young and old (when I say old - that’s Alla I’m referring to of course, your secret is safe with me Iryna). The first of these is particularly significant – Iryna (the living saint of Gorodishche) is celebrating and she chose to come to work for the day to be sure she can celebrate with her Irish friends.

On Saturday morning, Iryna and some other ladies from the orphanage left us in the Groups in order to go and prepare for her party (a local custom where the person who is celebrating does all of the preparations – Belarus can keep that custom). We arrive to the small kitchen to what can only be described as a fullon banquet, fittingly as we celebrate with a queen! There’s more chicken (3 varieties) and spuds (they are big potato eaters here) that a group twice our size would be able to consume, but this is the season of overindulgence!

A little local “juice” to wash the food down and them some birthday wishes to Iryna from all in attendance (and lots of gifts). Iryna tells us that she is past retirement age in Belarus but speaks of being happy that she is kept busy in Gorodishche. “If I were retired, I would simply spend my time sitting around with a bunch of old women, gossiping” she tells us. She has no thoughts of retirement, and Gorodishche is happy about this (as are all of the volunteers that she selflessly helps each year). A beautifully written poem, in homage to Iryna, is read and presented – a most beautiful moment and I’m very happy to say; “I was there”.

Iryna declares this her best birthday party ever, and I believe her. Not because I want (or need) to be part of a “best ever” but it is clear that Iryna is with those that she values most in this environment – her closest work colleagues and a handful of Irish volunteers. She will celebrate with her family later, and share what we, the Irish, think of our friend.

As she brought up the subject – I dare to think of a Gorodishche without the wonderful Iryna. I know that when we leave, Iryna keeps Ireland alive in the hearts and minds of all in Gorodishche; and that all of our friends have a beautiful Irish mammy to take care of them, until we can return.

Spice Girls (minus 1)

If any of you reading this has teenagers (or younger these days), you will know that their most prized possession is their mobile phone. It’s a “must have” necessity. From early in the visit I have been getting persistent requests for a phone from Slava. Every time I was with his Group, I had him tugging at me with the request for his “telefon”. I hadn’t brought phones to Belarus with me and I know that he would be desperately disappointed if I could not magic one up for him. Enter the saviour of the day – Claire. Claire (who’s from Cork – now that’s confusing) had brought a few phones and one was Slava bound.

Every day of our visit there was a disco on in the hall, and on our next visit there I approached Slava and presented him with the gift. His eyes lit up and his face oozed joy, he had his own telephone. The next 20 minutes was spent going around the hall on his phone and taking photographs on it and showing these to his buddies. He even took a moment to stop and take a photo of me taking a photo of him – his face tells the story of what a simple plastic flip-top phone meant to him. This is a photo that embodies the sheer joy and unbridled innocence of our friends in Gorodishche.

Every visit we are looking to see what has changed, hopefully for the better. Every volunteer hopes that the contribution they are making is having a lasting impact (small steps forward). The independent Group is the dream for those young people that are capable of getting to a level of independent living (albeit assisted) and the absolute ideal is that these young adults might move on to apprenticeships or get a job that will allow them to move on from the orphanage. This doesn’t always work out; I know that I’ve written of Sergei in the past where it looked like he was a great news story but that didn’t really materialise (although it appears to be a little better now for him).

During the year; Dima and Sveta had moved from the orphanage and were setup for true independent living. The big change this time was that they were not sent away to their hometowns/area but were given an apartment just outside the gates of the orphanage (their place has become affectionately known as 2 Orphan Road). They both have jobs back in the orphanage, so they are living in close proximity (to be watched/minded) outside the orphanage. In September they will move on to do some course/apprenticeship in order to set them up to work entirely separately from the orphanage.

We visited the new apartment and Dima delighted at showing us around. It looked fantastic and he was as proud as a peacock (even offering us some salo that was sitting on the table). At first glance salo can look like hard sheep’s cheese or a smoky mozzarella. But the slabs are actually cold, white pork fat. Apparently, it is best served covered with garlic, onion and pickles and almost always washed down with a shot of vodka. Even the temptation of vodka (which of course they don’t have in the apartment) was not enough to tempt me to eat this lump of lard, I’ll stick to the pot noodles for now

Did I tell you about our slightly selfish reason for this visit? Well I can guarantee that it was a very selfish and joyous moment – our Tanya is 18!

The love affair (and that’s what you can call this relationship with Tanya) started many years ago with Joanne’s first visit to Gorodishche. Tanya did what she does best (call it survival), she forced another Irish volunteer to become her Mama. But this Mother and Child union was a bit different! For starters, they were woven from the same cloth – they are both emotional beings that thrive on living in the present moment and who are what they are – warts (or wheelchairs) and all. Joanne moved from Mama to Mammy and as a result, I became Papa (albeit from a distance). Joanne’s love for Tanya grew over the years and it was impossible for me to not become a physical part of this wonderful relationship. Tanya met Papa in 2017 and I fully understood all that I had heard of our beautiful baby.

Plans were made some time ago to be with Tanya for her special occasion, I doubt that she could dream what 18 years olds in Ireland do to celebrate the occasion (we had just had one for Adam), but I expected that she would appreciate that she was celebrating her birthday with those that have become her family. And in Joanne style, there was to be two big events to celebrate the occasion!

One of the jobs that has to be done during this time of the year is keeping the walkways clear of snow, work for the boys in Group 2 and the Independents. We sat one morning watching Dima (he knew we were watching) as he made a huge job out of clearing the snow outside the Irish Kitchen. He meticulously cleared the path to a small pile outside the window and once this was done, he moved the pile to the other side of the path – talk about making work for himself! But he was happy to keep busy and to ensure that we were watching him work so very hard. If he ever gets to Ireland, there’s surely a full-time job for him in Clare County Council.

The question that I am asked upon returning each time, “well, are things getting better”. And I guess it’s the question that’s on my mind as I set out to visit each trip. The answer is YES, things are always getting better, but let’s not sugar coat the situation too much!

When I think about what “things” are getting better or worse, I always look at some of those that have become my favourites and I look to see how they are doing. Are there changes, mostly subtle, in how they look or (re)act. Are they healthier (at least outwardly) than when I last saw them – as I read this back over, I realise how hopeless a barometer this is of improvements!

Nastia is well, a significant improvement on when I left her last year. I had spoken only of her dis-improving with each visit, this was such a relief. Her medication is clearly working, she did not have a single seizure during all of the times that I spent with her. And she is being forced to sit up and feed herself in the bed, another massive step in the new regime that seems to be taking hold in the Orphanage (although I did feed her on a couple of occasions, this was as much about allowing me to spend time with her as it was with giving her a break). And does she look happy – you can be the judge of that!

She joined us in the hall for the local disco’s, but this time of year means that she (like all of the others) doesn’t get to go outdoors. Everyone looks a little paler, but her form is very good; and her health is so much better. A great news story.

Kyriel had a visit from his family while we were in the Orphanage, his mother, father, and sister came to spend a few hours with him in the family room. They have visited before, but it appears that the visits are more frequent. Quite bizarrely, we are told that Kyriel does not want to go home as he feels that his disabilities will bring shame on his family. He has a twin brother who doesn’t visit this time, a brother that looks quite different to our special boy. Joanne gets to meet the family (I’m really sorry that I didn’t take a moment to say what a special boy Kyriel is) and she has a very emotional encounter with Kyriel’s mother. Joanne expresses to her our view of their special boy – and there is no doubt left in that room about what Kyriel means to the visiting Irish. I ask him later that evening if he would like to live at home. He hesitates for quite some time before nodding – Yes.

I have had very regular contact with Kyriel since my last visit, he regularly calls on WhatsApp and manages to bring the mayhem of Group 4 into our world on most Sundays. Language is, of course, a barrier but we manage to get across the things that are important. Things like “my android tablet is broken, could you get it fixed in Ireland”. I understand that and can easily translate this to “any chance you could bring me a new tablet when you come next”. Sorted, thanks to a kind donation from Shannon. Now how to get his one fixed and back in the summer?

Each new visit brings different faces and personalities into my world. Loveable rogues, playful children, and quiet reflective ones – there are more and more to remember.

From my first visit I have had a very strong connection to Masha (quiet and reflective one), a fascinating and intriguing soul (and I use those words deliberately – there’s definitely something about Masha!). I know that others are attracted to this impish looking young lady, maybe they sense that she is very special too.

Masha is a grinder and a rocker; if she was in Ireland this would be seen as cool and she would be a music loving skateboarder. But not so; Masha lives in a place that appears to be such an isolated and lonely world. Connecting with Masha is not always easy, she likes to stay alone. But when she connects; she has a smile to warm to coldest heart. In her striking yellow and bright pink, her frowns turn to smiles and . . . wow.

I get the opportunity to dance with her in the hall later in the week, but I have to stand in line as I’m not the only one that wants her to dance. When she’s good she’s very good but I often see her when she’s not that good. I wonder what goes on in her world?

There are many others, too many to tell you all of their stories. But one other new friend (well new-ish) is Yullya. She is a flirter – and is she bould; oh yes she is! But she falls into the category of a loveable rogue. We met first in the snow back in March – she was the one that got me in trouble for throwing snowballs (I was innocent). Our next encounter during the Summer saw the bould side of her come out as I was on the receiving end of a rather rude gesture (I blame the Irish for teaching her).

This trip we have great fun and she spent her time looking to be chased around the Christmas tree. Such innocent fun – her squeals as I changed direction to catch her. But what a smile – the perfect picture of happiness in a world that is not always so bright and happy.

Joanne was immediately attracted to Tanya because they were so alike (and they are alike in so many ways). I immediately took to Lida for the same reasons, albeit they are entirely different beings. Lida is the practical one, not so expressive but “ever the helper”. We are alike also in so many ways (but I’m glad that she didn’t get my looks!).

This trip I saw a very different Lida, a much “huggier” and emotional lady – most of the time. She spent less time on toilet duty and as such she was with the Group most of the evenings that we called in. We had some lovely time together, although there were occasions when I was only useful for my phone and the photo’s that Lida loves to look through (she especially wants to look at photos from Ireland).

And as for that photo shoot she wanted with her new jumper – not content with the initial shot, we eventually got the perfect photo at number four. But it was worth the extra poses! On the day that we were leaving – that’s always a tough day for all involved – I dropped Lida back to her room, but she disappeared to the toilet. I left and went back to the Irish Kitchen, awaiting the arrival of the transport back to Minsk.

But I hadn’t said farewell! I quickly made my way back to the room to give her a farewell hug and kiss. What a surprise – she burst into tears and clung on to me for dear life. For once it was Tanya that was the voice of calm – “Не плачь” (“don’t cry”) she called out to Lida. But it was time to go – ouch I was not expecting that.